Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
