Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Do you still have your period?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize