I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
