I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
