In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize