We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
