it's too hot outside to masturbate.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
