During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
There are leaves in my underwear?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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