Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize
