she was so not down for the gang bang
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
