Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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