addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
He better not be in your backpack
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
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