Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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