great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
