we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
