he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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