Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
