you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I need to sanitize my soul.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
