Sponge bath it is.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
