I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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