How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
