Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
And then he peed in my hair
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