remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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