Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
