i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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