tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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