i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
