No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
