doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
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