When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
