Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
