gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Randomize
