when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
