I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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