Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize