i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
