so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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