best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
