That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
There r osticjed everywhere
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
