I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
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