There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
She just used a chaser for red wine.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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