I didn't shave. On purpose
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Randomize
