There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Randomize
