haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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