I like to think it a success when the cops are called
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
