We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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