honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
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