There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
