Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
