Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
